Apple is synonymous with gadgets and being ridiculously successful, and it’s got the numbers to back it up. The Cupertino-based tech giant has just enjoyed its most profitable quarter of all time with revenues that make armies look small. No, seriously, Apple has received more cash in the last three months than the Department of Defense gets in a year. (They’re also much better at penetrating foreign targets and setting up new systems in hostile regimes.)
The big number is 35.08 billion quid, and you bet we go to the second decimal place when that place is more money than we’ll ever see. Of that, 9.89 gigapounds are pure profit. In other words, if you got to keep all the money received by the Bahamas, Barbados, AND Gibraltar for an entire year, sacking the government and switching off entire islands, you’d make almost as much money as Apple gets in a season.
Even more important are the sales figures per product. iPhone sales are up 128% over the same quarter last year, so any idea that people are getting sick of endless new versions is wrong for a truly incredible number of reasons: 37 million of them, at last count, and every one of them carried around by a loyal customer.
15.4 million iPads are a testament to the Apple strategy of “create a new market and then dominate it”, which is a lot easier than most companies’ “See that market with dozens of megacorporations? We should try to wedge ourselves in there” approach. Apple redefined smartphones for the vast majority of the population (the people who think “specifications” are just a very good Scrabble word), and while the iPad didn’t invent the idea of a tablet, it did invent the concept of caring about one.
This increase in iPhone sales is even more important, because the 4S evolved the concept design about as much as someone’s grandchild evolves humanity. The physical design is almost identical because all the important differences are in the software: faster, better adapted to the modern world, and much better with computers. Siri has been the killer feature for this generation, and while some say describing computers which can understand you and make decisions as “killer” is a bad idea, we say it’s just saving time.
The best bit? Apple aren’t the only ones making a profit. Android phones are outperforming even these ridiculous figures in some fields, because the only thing better for a customer than their brand doing well is that brand’s competitors doing well too. Because then they both have to improve, and when the last update was a talking robot butler inside your handset, that means the next thing will have to be awesome.