Every man and his dog is bringing out a phone these days, usually companies with absolutely nothing to do with the mobile industry like Prada, Tag Heuer, Levis and Aston Martin. So who’s going to be the next to slap their brand on a mobile phone?
Swatch Phone- This is actually the inspiration for this post – Swatch have revealed a pretty insane looking concept device, that seems to have every other electronic gadget on the market, it’s a surprise a phone hasn’t been thrown in there too for good measure. And if Tag can do it…
Swiss Army Phone – Convergence is the key these days, so why don’t we have a phone from the leading name in pocket usefulness? The pull-out toothpick could even double as a stylus for use with the touchscreen! Actually this guy’s already thought of it.
Burberry/Hackett/Stone Island Phone - Why hasn’t anyone thought of doing a chav phone before? If you can get a corner in the chav market, there’s no limit to the number of cloned goons you can flog your overpriced fashion muck to. Imagine designing the pink Hackett shirt of the mobile market!
Canon/Fugi/Nikon Phone - If camera phones get any better, camera manufacturers are going to be out of work, so how long before we see a super camera, that happens to have a phone tacked on the side?
Harley Davidson Phone - They’ve never been afraid to plaster their brand on all kinds of things that have nothing to do with motorbikes, I think I’ve even got a Harley Davidson pencil case somewhere, so a phone is a logical step. There’s already a replica motorobike phone for the landline!
Landrover/Timberland/Caterpillar Phone - A rugged man’s phone you can go rock climbing with. Impervious to all the natural world can throw at it, it can be submerged in a ravine, dropped off a cliff or struck by lightning. Comes with a built-in compass and Sat Nav in case you’re not as outdoorsy as you think you are.
Army Phone – For people who’d like to pretend they’re talking on walkie-talkies. It’s made of riveted metal, has two buttons – talk and stop, and can withstand being driven over by a jeep.
Tweenies Phone - Or whatever the latest temporary nursery school fad is. Kids need to talk these days, no self-respecting seven or eight year old can be seen out without the latest in handheld communication, and it’s not cool having Mum’s old phone either.
David Beckham Phone - He’s got a perfume, a computer game, a clothing range at M&S, a sportswear brand and a slick logo that would look great embossed in silver on the front of a phone. He’s also a brand ambassador for Motorola so he’s no doubt well read in the ups and downs of the mobile industry! The phone will be simple but expensive and will only work in America.
Ann Summers Phone - Er… some joke about the vibrate mode…